Friday, August 24, 2012
Things no one tells you about breastfeeding
Mysterious scratches will appear on your chest and torso. I have got to keep this child's nails shorter.
Monday, August 20, 2012
2 months old (8/15/2012)
My how time flies! That may be a cliche, but it is oh so true.
She still seems so new and little, but at the same time she is so much bigger and stronger than she was even just a week or two ago. I find myself marveling about how long she has gotten and how big she is now, and then an hour later catching a glimpse in the mirror of her in my arms and thinking about how tiny she is. Her newborn clothes don't really fit anymore, though we can still stretch the newborn onsies over her body so she can wear them. The larger sized onsies are still loose and a little long in the torso. Her 0-3 month sleepers are getting too short, but a lot of them aren't too much too baggy anymore. Just as she is filling out her smaller sleepers she will be switching to the 3-6 month sleepers, it seems she really did get her dad's long and lean build! Her adorable 3 month sized outfits fit pretty well, if a little on the loose side. Regardless of the fit, it's fun dressing her up. In a post from just before Penny was born I mentioned how unreasonably small baby socks are, and said it is just silly that any person's foot should fit in them. Well, her feet don't. Baby socks are short and wide, but our baby's feet are long and thin. I foresee a lifetime of frustration when it comes to clothes shopping, poor baby.
Smiles abound these days. Penny greets me with a smile every time she wakes up from having slept enough rather than from being hungry. I can tell when hunger wakes her up because she starts rooting and fussing in her sleep. She smiles at us on the changing table (still loves diaper changes) smiles when we imitate her coos back to her. When we go out and strangers gush over her, she ponders them for a couple minutes before offering the new person a gummy grin. She also smiles at her dangling toys every day, and when I hung a bright alphabet quilt on the wall she smiled at it every time she noticed it for the first 3 days. Such a friendly baby!
She likes going out. She stares around with her eyes all big and looks continually amazed. One of the surest ways to calm a fussy Penny is to go outside and walk around. She also likes to stand up and look at the world. She supports pretty much all of her own weight these days, but has no sense of balance at all of course. When her legs get tired she likes to sit, but again has no balance and will topple if she isn't supported. Her head control is pretty good, she is getting less and less wobbly. She is starting to bat at things a little, and when her little hand makes contact her eyes get big with surprise or amazement. She is cooing and gurgling more and more often and with greater volume. She has been working on a laugh, but hasn't perfected that ability quite yet. Every now and then she will start with a new sound rather suddenly, often startling the dog who then stares at her with concern for several minutes. He is becoming used to her, but still hasn't quite decided what to do about her. It's cute.
The other day I was cooking dinner and Dan was changing Penny. He took the opportunity to coo and talk to her while she sucked her fingers and watched her. As he told it, she seemed to be in a good mood when suddenly out of nowhere she stiffened, flung both her arms out to the sides and started screaming bloody murder! After several minutes of listening to her inconsolable screaming I went in to see what was the matter. As far as we can tell, she bit herself. After she calmed down we had to chuckle about that. Silly baby.
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| Dozing with a full belly |
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| Greeting her dangly friends |
She likes going out. She stares around with her eyes all big and looks continually amazed. One of the surest ways to calm a fussy Penny is to go outside and walk around. She also likes to stand up and look at the world. She supports pretty much all of her own weight these days, but has no sense of balance at all of course. When her legs get tired she likes to sit, but again has no balance and will topple if she isn't supported. Her head control is pretty good, she is getting less and less wobbly. She is starting to bat at things a little, and when her little hand makes contact her eyes get big with surprise or amazement. She is cooing and gurgling more and more often and with greater volume. She has been working on a laugh, but hasn't perfected that ability quite yet. Every now and then she will start with a new sound rather suddenly, often startling the dog who then stares at her with concern for several minutes. He is becoming used to her, but still hasn't quite decided what to do about her. It's cute.The other day I was cooking dinner and Dan was changing Penny. He took the opportunity to coo and talk to her while she sucked her fingers and watched her. As he told it, she seemed to be in a good mood when suddenly out of nowhere she stiffened, flung both her arms out to the sides and started screaming bloody murder! After several minutes of listening to her inconsolable screaming I went in to see what was the matter. As far as we can tell, she bit herself. After she calmed down we had to chuckle about that. Silly baby.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Birth Story
I didn't have the completely natural birth I was so adamant about having. If I ever give birth again, I will go into it more prepared and have a better idea what to expect, as will Dan. Perhaps we will be in a better position to afford a doula's services. I still know I can do it all natural; I did most of it this time around and would have kept going if things had been a little different. I do feel a little disappointed in myself, but I'm not sad, traumatized, or sorry about the way things turned out. In the moment I did what I felt I needed, and it was the right thing for us.
Three days after my due date, I started having contractions. We had our final prenatal group appointment Thursday afternoon, during which I noticed a few irregular contractions. They were stronger than the braxton-hicks contractions I'd had before, but still not very strong so I didn't say anything. We went home and made dinner, and just after I'd finished the contractions got stronger and more regular. "Great!" I thought, "they say you should eat something when labor begins, I am so on top of that"! Not long afterwards, I threw up. Maybe fajitas aren't the best early labor food.
I put on a movie to help distract me from the contractions for a while. It was the first in the Harry Potter series, which my mom (who had arrived in town a couple days earlier) had never seen. This is relevant because in the 3 days during which the baby didn't have a name, my mom dubbed her "She Who Must Not Be Named".
Labor came on strong and fast, and I soon found that I couldn't sit still or pay attention to the movie. I started pacing. Eventually I ran a hot bath and got in. I was having back labor, and during every contraction I had Dan push hard on my sacrum to counter the pressure. I lost track of time pretty much completely, but after a couple hours I felt like it was time to go to the hospital. Dan called ahead, but since it was my first pregnancy and I'd only been having regular contractions for a couple hours they said we should wait before coming in. An hour later I made him call again, because things were getting really intense and I wasn't sure how I would tolerate a ride in the car with back labor I was still experiencing, which made sitting very uncomfortable. This time they heard me hollering in the background and told us to come on in. I think this was around 10 or 11 at night.
We got in to the parking garage and parked near the sky bridge before realizing it was closed for the night. So we had to walk down 3 flights of stairs and cross the street to enter the Emergency Room entrance. The lady at the desk escorted us up to the maternity ward, she was less than pleased. She seemed annoyed that I didn't want to sit in the wheelchair she brought, but reluctantly agreed to let me push it and lean on it instead. She was very impatient, I had a really hard time walking through the contractions but she didn't want to let me pause for anything. I think it's safe to say that no one liked her.
We arrived in the maternity ward and I nearly fell out of the elevator onto my hands and knees feeling like I was about to throw up again. A few deep breaths and my stomach stabilized without expelling any more of it's contents. The nurses who met us there were kind and understanding. They didn't rush me or push me and they got rid of Ms. Impatient immediately, to my relief. I don't know how long it took to get me all checked in, but after a while they checked me and were impressed that I was 6cm dilated. Then they ran water in their tub for me to get in. It seemed like forever until the tub was finally full, but finally I was able to get in.
All this time I was still having back labor and having Dan push hard on my sacrum during contractions. He was great, trying to do everything he could to help me. From the beginning he had been helping coach me using techniques we had discussed before hand. As it got later and he got more tired, he got quieter, but I didn't notice as I got deeper and deeper into "laborland" and became less and less aware of my surroundings. I never felt like I couldn't do it, like I needed to stop. I don't know how long I was in the tub, but eventually I got out and was checked again. 8cm! I felt good. I was getting tired (and so was Dan) but we only had 2 more centimeters left and I was confident that it would all be over soon enough. So I continued laboring in the room, pacing, jiggling my hips (apparently this made one of the nurses giggle, as she had never seen anyone do that during labor before), and having Dan push on my sacrum. My water broke while I was standing at the end of the bed, and splashed on the floor. Later I sat on a stool for a few contractions, and when I got up there was another big puddle of fluid. Eventually, despite being near exhaustion, I was feeling ready to push, and asked them to check me again.
Devastation. Somehow, I was back down to 6cm. I think it was around 5 or 6am at that point, and Dan had been up for about 24 hours. I'd had only a couple more hours sleep than him. I'd been in labor for at least 10 hours, with intense back labor the whole time. Now I felt that I was being told that I had to start over from where I was at the beginning of the night, and was facing another 8-10 hours before it would be time to push. I had been so sure I was now at 9 or 10 cm. I lost it. I cried. I couldn't start over like that. I couldn't do it, I didn't have that kind of stamina. I needed a break. I needed rest. I couldn't believe I was back down to 6. I was offered a shot containing pain killer that would take the edge off for an hour or so and might allow me to rest and get some energy back, and I agreed to try it.
The medicine helped a little, but it felt like only a few minutes later that the contractions were back in full force, and I did not feel rested or reenergized. I still felt devastated and exhausted. I asked for an epidural. My birth plan, which the hospital had on file, stated that I wanted a natural birth and did not want to be offered medication or an epidural. I give the staff credit because they asked me several times if I was really sure, and offered to try another dose of the pain killer I'd already had. I never felt pressured to get any type of painkiller, which is something I have heard that others who give birth in hospitals experience. Everything was my choice. I got an epidural. And I was finally able to relax. Poor Dan seemed hugely relieved. Hugely relieved is probably an understatement. He got to rest, too.
My mom, who had been in the room with us the whole time, went home to take care of the dog and get some rest herself. We napped for about 4 hours, I think. It was wonderful. I woke up feeling much better, ready to start over at the beginning of 10 more hours of labor if need be. I was checked once more, and hallelujah, 10cm! I wanted to be able to feel everything again, and had them turn the epidural way down. I wanted it out, I was feeling confident and great again and wanted to finish on my own. For me, the epidural got stronger closer to my feet. As the strength from my nap wore off, I could feel my contractions again quite well, part way down my thighs my legs felt tingly, and I couldn't feel my lower legs or feet at all. I also couldn't really move my legs, which I did not like. But I could feel the contractions with growing intensity, so I was satisfied that I would be able to push adequately. Later, as the epidural was being removed, the nurse made a surprised comment about how low it was. My mom arrived back at the hospital right as I was getting ready to call her and tell her it was time to push, great timing!
I pushed for 2-2 1/2 hours. It didn't feel all that long to me. They helped me get into a supported squat position for pushing. I guess that position was pretty effective, but after a while I had to move. My sacrum felt bruised from being pushed on so hard all night! They helped me onto my side, which was much better. My contractions were coming fairly far apart, but they were long and strong and I was able to get 4-6 pushes in during each one. The nurses said that the norm is about 3 pushes for each contraction. The midwife came in to prepare for delivery. It was the same midwife who had done our first prenatal appointment to confirm the pregnancy! I like her, and I like the way it came full circle with her delivering my little girl as well. They set up a mirror so that I could see the head beginning to crown. It was slow going they told me, because my pelvic muscles are very strong and tight. Strong pelvic muscles are good, they help you give birth more easily. Most of the time. But my pelvic muscles were tight and hindering progress, pushing the baby back up in between contractions. Because I was so tight, the midwife had both her hands stretching me to make room for the baby. She assured me that while I was tight, I was also strong and the baby was tolerating labor beautifully. I would give birth vaginally.
Someone came in to get the midwife. A woman in a different room was about to deliver, and the midwife hurried away and left me to continue with the help of my nurse. Eventually, she was ready to come. The nurse rushed off to get the midwife. There was meconium (newborn poo) and because of concern about the baby inhaling it, they planned to pull her out all at once. The baby coming down was the most intense feeling I had had yet, so I squeezed my eyes my eyes shut and pushed with everything I had. Suddenly, there were exclamations and I sensed a new kind of activity. Something about a baby. What? What baby? I opened my eyes, shocked to see the tiny person now resting on my abdomen. She was so... purple.
I was stunned. I didn't know if I wanted to laugh or cry. I wasn't sure this was even my baby. My baby wasn't purple, was she? Dan and I aren't purple. We checked, she was definitely still a girl. The cord stopped pulsing, Dan cut it. She was placed on my chest still yelling, but quickly calmed down. Gradually, oh so gradually, she stopped being purple. Ohmygodmybaby. Mybabymybabyohmygodbaby. Dan was there, by my head. Dan was always there, bless him. The midwife tugged on the cord to encourage the placenta to come, but the cord broke off. She had to reach in to get the placenta, which was almost as intense as giving birth had been. I yelled. The baby yelled. The baby. Ohmygodbabyohmygod. I was stitched up. There was some superficial tearing, only skin and not muscle. 6 stitches. There was the baby. Skin to skin contact. Baby. We tried breastfeeding after a while, but didn't get a good latch. We rested. The baby was taken, cleaned up, tagged, and swaddled. Her dad held her. My mom held her. I realized I was hungry and ordered food. I don't remember what I had, but it was absolutely delicious.
Three days after my due date, I started having contractions. We had our final prenatal group appointment Thursday afternoon, during which I noticed a few irregular contractions. They were stronger than the braxton-hicks contractions I'd had before, but still not very strong so I didn't say anything. We went home and made dinner, and just after I'd finished the contractions got stronger and more regular. "Great!" I thought, "they say you should eat something when labor begins, I am so on top of that"! Not long afterwards, I threw up. Maybe fajitas aren't the best early labor food.
I put on a movie to help distract me from the contractions for a while. It was the first in the Harry Potter series, which my mom (who had arrived in town a couple days earlier) had never seen. This is relevant because in the 3 days during which the baby didn't have a name, my mom dubbed her "She Who Must Not Be Named".
Labor came on strong and fast, and I soon found that I couldn't sit still or pay attention to the movie. I started pacing. Eventually I ran a hot bath and got in. I was having back labor, and during every contraction I had Dan push hard on my sacrum to counter the pressure. I lost track of time pretty much completely, but after a couple hours I felt like it was time to go to the hospital. Dan called ahead, but since it was my first pregnancy and I'd only been having regular contractions for a couple hours they said we should wait before coming in. An hour later I made him call again, because things were getting really intense and I wasn't sure how I would tolerate a ride in the car with back labor I was still experiencing, which made sitting very uncomfortable. This time they heard me hollering in the background and told us to come on in. I think this was around 10 or 11 at night.
We got in to the parking garage and parked near the sky bridge before realizing it was closed for the night. So we had to walk down 3 flights of stairs and cross the street to enter the Emergency Room entrance. The lady at the desk escorted us up to the maternity ward, she was less than pleased. She seemed annoyed that I didn't want to sit in the wheelchair she brought, but reluctantly agreed to let me push it and lean on it instead. She was very impatient, I had a really hard time walking through the contractions but she didn't want to let me pause for anything. I think it's safe to say that no one liked her.
We arrived in the maternity ward and I nearly fell out of the elevator onto my hands and knees feeling like I was about to throw up again. A few deep breaths and my stomach stabilized without expelling any more of it's contents. The nurses who met us there were kind and understanding. They didn't rush me or push me and they got rid of Ms. Impatient immediately, to my relief. I don't know how long it took to get me all checked in, but after a while they checked me and were impressed that I was 6cm dilated. Then they ran water in their tub for me to get in. It seemed like forever until the tub was finally full, but finally I was able to get in.
All this time I was still having back labor and having Dan push hard on my sacrum during contractions. He was great, trying to do everything he could to help me. From the beginning he had been helping coach me using techniques we had discussed before hand. As it got later and he got more tired, he got quieter, but I didn't notice as I got deeper and deeper into "laborland" and became less and less aware of my surroundings. I never felt like I couldn't do it, like I needed to stop. I don't know how long I was in the tub, but eventually I got out and was checked again. 8cm! I felt good. I was getting tired (and so was Dan) but we only had 2 more centimeters left and I was confident that it would all be over soon enough. So I continued laboring in the room, pacing, jiggling my hips (apparently this made one of the nurses giggle, as she had never seen anyone do that during labor before), and having Dan push on my sacrum. My water broke while I was standing at the end of the bed, and splashed on the floor. Later I sat on a stool for a few contractions, and when I got up there was another big puddle of fluid. Eventually, despite being near exhaustion, I was feeling ready to push, and asked them to check me again.
Devastation. Somehow, I was back down to 6cm. I think it was around 5 or 6am at that point, and Dan had been up for about 24 hours. I'd had only a couple more hours sleep than him. I'd been in labor for at least 10 hours, with intense back labor the whole time. Now I felt that I was being told that I had to start over from where I was at the beginning of the night, and was facing another 8-10 hours before it would be time to push. I had been so sure I was now at 9 or 10 cm. I lost it. I cried. I couldn't start over like that. I couldn't do it, I didn't have that kind of stamina. I needed a break. I needed rest. I couldn't believe I was back down to 6. I was offered a shot containing pain killer that would take the edge off for an hour or so and might allow me to rest and get some energy back, and I agreed to try it.
The medicine helped a little, but it felt like only a few minutes later that the contractions were back in full force, and I did not feel rested or reenergized. I still felt devastated and exhausted. I asked for an epidural. My birth plan, which the hospital had on file, stated that I wanted a natural birth and did not want to be offered medication or an epidural. I give the staff credit because they asked me several times if I was really sure, and offered to try another dose of the pain killer I'd already had. I never felt pressured to get any type of painkiller, which is something I have heard that others who give birth in hospitals experience. Everything was my choice. I got an epidural. And I was finally able to relax. Poor Dan seemed hugely relieved. Hugely relieved is probably an understatement. He got to rest, too.
My mom, who had been in the room with us the whole time, went home to take care of the dog and get some rest herself. We napped for about 4 hours, I think. It was wonderful. I woke up feeling much better, ready to start over at the beginning of 10 more hours of labor if need be. I was checked once more, and hallelujah, 10cm! I wanted to be able to feel everything again, and had them turn the epidural way down. I wanted it out, I was feeling confident and great again and wanted to finish on my own. For me, the epidural got stronger closer to my feet. As the strength from my nap wore off, I could feel my contractions again quite well, part way down my thighs my legs felt tingly, and I couldn't feel my lower legs or feet at all. I also couldn't really move my legs, which I did not like. But I could feel the contractions with growing intensity, so I was satisfied that I would be able to push adequately. Later, as the epidural was being removed, the nurse made a surprised comment about how low it was. My mom arrived back at the hospital right as I was getting ready to call her and tell her it was time to push, great timing!
I pushed for 2-2 1/2 hours. It didn't feel all that long to me. They helped me get into a supported squat position for pushing. I guess that position was pretty effective, but after a while I had to move. My sacrum felt bruised from being pushed on so hard all night! They helped me onto my side, which was much better. My contractions were coming fairly far apart, but they were long and strong and I was able to get 4-6 pushes in during each one. The nurses said that the norm is about 3 pushes for each contraction. The midwife came in to prepare for delivery. It was the same midwife who had done our first prenatal appointment to confirm the pregnancy! I like her, and I like the way it came full circle with her delivering my little girl as well. They set up a mirror so that I could see the head beginning to crown. It was slow going they told me, because my pelvic muscles are very strong and tight. Strong pelvic muscles are good, they help you give birth more easily. Most of the time. But my pelvic muscles were tight and hindering progress, pushing the baby back up in between contractions. Because I was so tight, the midwife had both her hands stretching me to make room for the baby. She assured me that while I was tight, I was also strong and the baby was tolerating labor beautifully. I would give birth vaginally.
Someone came in to get the midwife. A woman in a different room was about to deliver, and the midwife hurried away and left me to continue with the help of my nurse. Eventually, she was ready to come. The nurse rushed off to get the midwife. There was meconium (newborn poo) and because of concern about the baby inhaling it, they planned to pull her out all at once. The baby coming down was the most intense feeling I had had yet, so I squeezed my eyes my eyes shut and pushed with everything I had. Suddenly, there were exclamations and I sensed a new kind of activity. Something about a baby. What? What baby? I opened my eyes, shocked to see the tiny person now resting on my abdomen. She was so... purple.
I was stunned. I didn't know if I wanted to laugh or cry. I wasn't sure this was even my baby. My baby wasn't purple, was she? Dan and I aren't purple. We checked, she was definitely still a girl. The cord stopped pulsing, Dan cut it. She was placed on my chest still yelling, but quickly calmed down. Gradually, oh so gradually, she stopped being purple. Ohmygodmybaby. Mybabymybabyohmygodbaby. Dan was there, by my head. Dan was always there, bless him. The midwife tugged on the cord to encourage the placenta to come, but the cord broke off. She had to reach in to get the placenta, which was almost as intense as giving birth had been. I yelled. The baby yelled. The baby. Ohmygodbabyohmygod. I was stitched up. There was some superficial tearing, only skin and not muscle. 6 stitches. There was the baby. Skin to skin contact. Baby. We tried breastfeeding after a while, but didn't get a good latch. We rested. The baby was taken, cleaned up, tagged, and swaddled. Her dad held her. My mom held her. I realized I was hungry and ordered food. I don't remember what I had, but it was absolutely delicious.
Monday, August 6, 2012
Babies are Fun
Dan- "I'm going to go clean the spit-up from inside of my belly button".
Penny (looking pleased with herself)- "Agoo eugh"!
Penny (looking pleased with herself)- "Agoo eugh"!
Monday, July 23, 2012
It's been a month! (7/15/2012)
My baby is a month old already!
When I was asked recently how I like being home all day, I realized that I really don't feel like I have time for anything else. I can't imagine trying to go back to work any time soon! She eats every 1 1/2-3 hours during the day, and takes anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour to finish, depending on her hunger and the number of breaks she takes and how often she falls asleep while nursing. If we haven't done a diaper change while she was taking a nursing break, she needs one when she's finished. Then she needs to be soothed to sleep, or played with for a while until she gets sleepy and then soothed to sleep. And she is so irresistibly adorable that it's hard to put her down right when she's fallen asleep on me and not in her rocker or somewhere else. By the time we get through all that another hour has easily passed and I have up to an hour to feed, clean, and/or toilet myself and the dog, pump some milk to store, scrub the baby poop out of whatever has most recently been soiled, and try to accomplish something as far as house cleaning. I feel good about myself if I can do one chore per day. Extra good if the dog gets a walk and some love as well.
Penny is growing and developing like a champ! Her two week birthday was marked by the arrival of her birth certificate and social security card, and the loss of the stump of the umbilical cord. Unfortunately, the birth certificate claimed she was male, and had to be returned for correction. Penny celebrated turning two weeks old by being fantastically fussy all day, and refusing to nap longer than a few minutes at a time. My mom was still here to help me deal with that, so I had some relief. Penny slept great that night.
Birth weight was attained once again by her doctor appointment at 10 days. For those who don't know, newborn babies who are breast fed lose weight after being born. They don't eat much the first day or two, they are too busy recovering from birth. Their mother's milk doesn't come in for a few days either, and while colostrum provides important antibodies it doesn't provide many calories. Babies start gaining weight again as their appetite increases and the milk comes in, and most babies have regained their birth weight by 2 weeks old. So Penny was right on track! She has continued to gain, which I can tell because her newborn size clothes are stretching to fit her these days. We have been dressing her in 0-3 month size sleepers since we brought her home, and they are fitting her much better now than they did at one week old. She is now the right length for the 0-3 month size, but the sleepers are all baggy and much too big around the middle. It looks like she is already long and lean, just like her dad.
Her face has changed in shape already. The round, puffy newborn face has gotten a little longer and leaner. She has stopped doing The Woodpecker like she used to, instead she turns her head more slowly, letting my nipple brush her lips a few times, before suddenly opening her mouth wide and diving her face into my breast for the latch. Her full and satisfied face that she makes when she's finished nursing hasn't changed yet. I'm glad, because that face is adorable. A new habit she has recently developed is nursing with her eyes open, usually staring blankly at whatever is in front of her face (my boob) but sometimes gazing up at me or something else that has caught her fancy. Once, she tried to turn her head to look out the window. We won't be allowing that one to happen again, ouch!
Penny's newborn startle reflex is diminishing in frequency, but not in the amount of amusement it provides her parents. When some sound or shift in position of whoever is holding her sets off the reflex her arms fly up with her hands splayed open, then slowly drift back down into relaxation. The hands are the only indication she is not fully sound asleep; her eyes stay closed and she doesn't stir or become upset. Sometimes we miss whatever caused the startle (a car passing on the street? a sniffle? the clink of silverware against a dish?) but glance at her in time to see her hands doing their slow motion descent back down to her lap. Sometimes they get stuck after her elbow touches down, and she sleeps for a while with her open hand above her chest as if telling us not to pick her up and disturb the bliss of her milky dreams.
The smiles. Oh, the delightful smiles. She is starting to smile in response to things. On the changing table she will give us big toothless grins while we marvel to her about her impressive ability to dirty her bottom and soak a diaper in 5 seconds flat. She will also smile at my breast after falling asleep while nursing, and at the window, which holds her in fascination. Toothless grins really are the best kind.
Awake time is getting longer and more frequent as Penny learns that she can be awake and alert without having to be hungry or on the changing table. Have I mentioned how much she loves being on the changing table? Loves. It. She calms down immediately upon being set down, and cheerfully stretches and kicks and flails her arms, while offering us her sweetest, biggest smiles. But lately she has also been cheerful and smiley while not on the changing table. This has changed my life. Almost as often as not she is content to be left in her rocking chair or on the floor (on a mat or blanket of course) to stare at things and kick her legs. The other day I'm pretty sure she was watching her own arm move around. She particularly likes the pink pig toy that dangles from her chair, showing obvious preference for it over the blue sheep that hangs on the other side. This leads me to believe that she will eventually exhibit a strong affinity for all things pink and frilly and fluffy, much like I did as a small child even though that kind of thing makes me want to throw up a little nowadays. Oh, well. When she's old enough to demand the most ridiculously girly things, she shall have ridiculously girly things. I just hope she will also deign to play in the dirt with me!
The dog is warming up to the baby, slowly but surely. Poor Bilbo was terrified of her when she first came home and refused to come closer to her than 2 or 3 feet. Funny little dog worries about her though; when she cried the first night he hopped up on our bed to make sure we attended to her. He will come into the room in which she is upset if he was sleeping in a different room, and if she cries and I don't immediately go to her, he stares at me until I do. Now that he's had some time to adjust he will sometimes go up and sniff her of his own free will, but only if he thinks no one (including the baby) is paying attention. Silly dog. But then again, maybe he is right to be cautious. Maybe he is dreading the day she discovers he exists, and later the day when she becomes mobile and begins chasing him down with her sticky baby fingers and drooly baby mouth. Maybe he is being a smart dog, after all.
When I was asked recently how I like being home all day, I realized that I really don't feel like I have time for anything else. I can't imagine trying to go back to work any time soon! She eats every 1 1/2-3 hours during the day, and takes anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour to finish, depending on her hunger and the number of breaks she takes and how often she falls asleep while nursing. If we haven't done a diaper change while she was taking a nursing break, she needs one when she's finished. Then she needs to be soothed to sleep, or played with for a while until she gets sleepy and then soothed to sleep. And she is so irresistibly adorable that it's hard to put her down right when she's fallen asleep on me and not in her rocker or somewhere else. By the time we get through all that another hour has easily passed and I have up to an hour to feed, clean, and/or toilet myself and the dog, pump some milk to store, scrub the baby poop out of whatever has most recently been soiled, and try to accomplish something as far as house cleaning. I feel good about myself if I can do one chore per day. Extra good if the dog gets a walk and some love as well.
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| Who could resist this face? |
Birth weight was attained once again by her doctor appointment at 10 days. For those who don't know, newborn babies who are breast fed lose weight after being born. They don't eat much the first day or two, they are too busy recovering from birth. Their mother's milk doesn't come in for a few days either, and while colostrum provides important antibodies it doesn't provide many calories. Babies start gaining weight again as their appetite increases and the milk comes in, and most babies have regained their birth weight by 2 weeks old. So Penny was right on track! She has continued to gain, which I can tell because her newborn size clothes are stretching to fit her these days. We have been dressing her in 0-3 month size sleepers since we brought her home, and they are fitting her much better now than they did at one week old. She is now the right length for the 0-3 month size, but the sleepers are all baggy and much too big around the middle. It looks like she is already long and lean, just like her dad.
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| Changing table fun time |
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| The tail end of a toothless grin |
The smiles. Oh, the delightful smiles. She is starting to smile in response to things. On the changing table she will give us big toothless grins while we marvel to her about her impressive ability to dirty her bottom and soak a diaper in 5 seconds flat. She will also smile at my breast after falling asleep while nursing, and at the window, which holds her in fascination. Toothless grins really are the best kind.
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| Loving that pig |
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| Interested, because she's not looking |
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Penny, 1 week old! 6/23/2012
I've known this little girl for a week and she already has me (and Dan) wrapped around her finger. She certainly runs the schedule! New babies are known for doing very little aside from eating, pooping, and sleeping. Well, little Penny is no exception! But there are so many little things about her that make her unique and loveable. Maybe (okay, probably) she isn't as unique as I think, but this whole baby thing is new to me so give me a break. I do know for sure that her cry is her own and both Dan and I can pick it out from a room full of crying babies. Her cry isn't nearly as annoying as all the rest.
When I feed her she does this thing with her head that my mom calls The Woodpecker- she searches for my nipple by bobbing her head towards me and then jerking back a couple times until she gets her mouth in the right general area. Then she shakes her head back and forth with really small, quick movements. I know she's trying to latch, but her aim is terrible and its adorable.
All these darling baby things about her won't last long. The way she smells has already changed, in such a short time! When we brought her home she had the sweet smell of colostrum (pre-milk; milk doesn't actually come in until a few days after birth) and new baby and I just couldn't get enough. Now my milk is in and she smells like baby and milk. I can not believe how quickly her scent changed, I thought (hoped) she would smell like that forever!
When I feed her she does this thing with her head that my mom calls The Woodpecker- she searches for my nipple by bobbing her head towards me and then jerking back a couple times until she gets her mouth in the right general area. Then she shakes her head back and forth with really small, quick movements. I know she's trying to latch, but her aim is terrible and its adorable.
When she's done feeding she pulls back with her chin up, eyes closed, and the most satisfied little pout on her face. If she doesn't immediately fall asleep for a couple hours, she opens her eyes wide and looks around, staring mostly at the ceiling but sometimes at my face. She will wave her arms around with her long fingers extended and motioning like a sorceress. When she gets tired she sighs deeply, letting her arms suddenly drop and her back slouch on the exhale. Or, if she stays sleeping, various facial expressions chase themselves across her face. She makes the best faces, from frowning to confusion to eye rolling and everything in between. She occasionally makes little half smiles and even more occasionally big grins. I know there is no intent or response behind them yet, but her smiles are simply heart melting. Best. Thing. Ever. And that is not an exaggeration.
She holds her right hand near her face and waves her fingers, again looking like she is practicing magic. She likes to wave it around while she is nursing, and I often have to pin it down between us to get it out of the way so we can continue nursing. Her pesky right arm is constantly escaping her swaddle and frustrating Penny by stealing her pacifier, clawing her cheek, and generally making mischief. She can't learn gross motor control soon enough!
Penny has gotten used to diaper changes and no longer vigorously protests. When she is laid out to be changed she throws her head back and to one side and looks curiously around above herself, turning her head quietly back and forth while her feet kick and arms wave aimlessly. Or, since the changing table is next to the window, she will stare up at the sky with her lips pursed and her eyes wide. Some of my favorite moments are while she is being changed, because she goes into a quiet alert state and is clearly the best baby in the world.
There are a million more little habits she already has, and I adore every single one of them. I was told recently that with the first child, parents can't wait for them to hurry up and meet each milestone as they grow, but with later children they want to hold on to every moment. I must have mothered a child in a past life, because I don't want Penny to get big and start crawling! I think I'd be happy if she stayed this little and sweet and cuddly for a long time. Her clothes are all too big (we avoided getting newborn sizes as much as possible) and she looks adorable in them, I like being able to put her down for a moment and know she isn't going anywhere, and snuggling with a newborn makes the world an infinitely better place. We made a perfect baby, and I want to enjoy her tiny perfection as long as possible.
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